Three-Year-Old Theology... Easter

Eva has been more and more aware of faith and theological concepts lately. It fascinates me to hear what things stick out to her from stories or conversations we have, and what logical connections her little brain makes. It is also interesting to me how challenging it can be to describe to her the sometimes elusive concepts that describe having a relationship in an all-knowing, all-powerful, creator of all; a non-corporeal God, who then was a person for awhile and taught a lot of things and loved a lot of people and made a lot of people mad, but then died, then was alive again, and now is back in heaven and you can't see Him, but we can talk to him, listen to him, and thank him for things. It IS just a little confusing, right? 

I also laugh at myself at the temptation to both under and over-explain faith concepts to her. Sometimes I give a one sentence "Jesus loves you," rainbows and butterflies, kind of answer, and I swear she kind of looks at me with an expression that says, give me a little more to work with here mom. Other times, I try to connect all the big concepts we've talked about and get all excited about how profound and amazing something is, and she pulls me back to earth with the one detail that she cared about in my long rant and the way she heard it. A friend gave us this super cute kid devo book this week and I was loving the reflection for the day and all she would talk about was the baby bird in the picture. :) Oh well. It is a good reminder that she is experiential right now, connecting the dots to her feelings and her world. I am always surprised actually when she asks a specifically theological question, since I mostly leave it up to her to probe or go deeper. I figure our job right now is to immerse her in relationships and ways of life that will be explained logically when she is older...

But I think I am getting closer and closer to perceiving what level she understands and responding to what she is actually putting together, which is really kind of fun. We have conversations about a lot of topics lately, where she explains things and connects the dots for me, and its both hilarious and touching to hear how her brain reasons. Whether its her idea of what clothes should match, or where dad might be when he's at work, to why things are scary or not - her little brain is definitely thinking. 

Last night we were reading an Easter storybook that she always asks me to read her for bedtime. The book does an okay job of explaining to its characters - a family with three kids - how the Easter bunny/eggs, springtime, new life and Jesus are all related to Eastertime. I always read it a little differently then the author intended, however, and add a bunch of details around why Jesus was buried in a tomb with a big rock and then how he could be alive, and try to get across both how big of a deal dying was, and how big of a deal being alive again was. Lately she is wrestling with figuring out who God and Jesus are (as in both the same and different, we mostly stick to same), and wondering about where God is physically. And she's also been interested in connecting the creation story and Noah's animals to the idea that God made everything. During the story, she asked me about a dozen questions about the tomb, the stone, how God who was so strong and made everything could die, how God who was so strong was alive again, etc. 

Then she paused and said, "I just miss Jesus... I am tired of him being in that faraway country, you know heaven?" I kind of melted, and asked her where she thought that was. She said it was too far away, and also "upstairs, maybe with our neighbors?"  :) 

I was thinking, yeah, its hard for most adults to not see him too... I get it. I've tried the whole "Jesus is with each of us" a couple different ways as an explanation, but she doesn't go for that one yet. I asked if she talked to Jesus when she missed him, and she said yeah, but she was still sad he was gone. I said Jesus is with us whenever we ask Him to be, and told her that we pray so that we can talk to Jesus and listen to Him too. She asked where Jesus'  mom and dad were, if they missed him back in Bethlehem, or where they were. And she wondered if they were sad when he was behind the rock. Then she looked at me really seriously and said something roughly like, "Well, our house is really strong, 'cause God made it, and my books won't fall over, cause God made them strong too, but I think that God was really, really, really strong to get out and come from behind that rock!"

So - big creator God, overcomes big scary death, made all she has cause He is big and strong, and keeps her and her treasures safe, but is sometimes too far away to see or sense, and she wants to see Him more, so she misses Him. That is not a bad paraphrase of the message of Easter, actually. It is really fascinating what makes sense in a three-year-old's head, and what it helps me think about along the way!   

Celebrating Eva at Three Years Old!

It is amazing to me that it was three year ago that Eva came into this world! The root word behind her name means "life," and many times over this past year I've thought about how much life she carries everywhere she goes, and how much life she brought to me in so many ways. As she turns three, I think about the things that make her who she is, the things I want to celebrate and cultivate and remember - and smile over....
Eva is fundamentally an emotional, creative, and exuberant personality. She's quick to learn and pretend, is creative and musical, loves the trampolene and playing tag, is pretty extroverted and talkative with others, and has kept her on-going love affair with puppies and dogs of all forms as she gets older. She loves the Sound of Music, reading, kiwi, her sandbox, swimming/baths, chocolate, being goofy and silly, playing with her dollhouse, being with friends, dancing, her trains, dress-up, cuddling with her mom, coloring, and cooking with her dad.   

Eva has grown up a lot this past year; she often makes these colossal jumps forward and I feel like we catch up afterward. Oh, now you wear size 4T and 5T and you have three new inches of hair somehow!  Oh, now you want to do that all on your own, are strong enough for that, and won't eat that. Thanks for letting me know. :) She's made amazing leaps in her capacity for learning, talking, listening, remembering, being creative, and in relationships with others. She explained "echo-location" and how bats squeak to find things while on a car ride the other day, easily remembers the words to songs she hears more then a couple times, and can whack her t-ball across the yard without hesitation. She surprised me by starting to write the first two letters of her name lately, and has long been able to spell her name and also M-O-M. Her logic seems to grow daily, as she strings together how food goes in your tummy and then turns into poop, how seeds need water and sun and then they grow into plants, how if she listens well she gets a sticker and then she gets a new toy (we think she gets this one - we'll see!). She tenderly cares for and dresses her baby dolls, makes up animal sounds and names routinely, and loves pretending of all kinds - with her doll house people, baby dolls, animals, puppets, book characters, little people, etc. She's also still crafty, loving paint/draw/color/cut and glue/sticker time, and pretend reads to herself often.  

Opening birthday presents last week

Eva is also still very expressive, and I watch with interest as her emotions continue to develop. She still flaps her arms when excited (which is often), and exuberantly welcomes people when she sees them with big hugs and exclamations of, "I am so glad that you're here!"  She loves time with our friends who come over, family out of town who visit, friends her age at church, and folks she sees all the time - like the grocery store guy who gives her chocolate, or the teacher at gymnastics. She also feels and names new feelings lately, like being proud, guilty, or feeling shy. It is cool to watch Peter help her understand her feelings when they overwhelm her (and sometimes me!), as the two of them talk through what she feels or what he intuitively understands she feels when she isn't able to express it herself. He is such a great dad in many, many ways, but it's a God-given gift that he can help her process and feel her wide range of emotions in certain settings, since he is wired more that way himself. I, on the other hand, tend to help her talk about her feelings and her thoughts, and provide the verbal affirmation that she is safe and connected and loved, based on my wiring. Eva sometimes seems to ask each of us for this emotional affirmation, that she is solid, she is secure, safe and connected. It could be reaching out to hold my hand in the car, or snuggling up at night, or taking my cheeks in her hands; maybe its jumping on her dad to tickle with him or chasing him while brushing her teeth - she's just a fabulously affectionate little person. 

Ta-da! New ballerina leotard!

Eva is also a bit of a performer already and loves to make up songs, dance in her ballerina leotard, dress up, try on clothes/hats/shoes in front of her mirror, and see pictures/videos of herself. She laughs at herself and us easily, and has a giggle that lights up the room!  Her common phrases include, "Oh dear," "That's cool," "Maybe I will....," and "Here's the deal...." She has started throwing in surprising vocab words too, like "actually," "definitely," and "recently" - although she says, "last year" for any unit of time previous to the present. She still easily picks some basic spanish from tv shows and a few books, and loves hearing her french books read to her too.   

We've also continued to see what Eva doesn't do so well. She's not great at goodbyes, or with not knowing that something is happening ahead of time - especially a big transition. She is also perfecting the art of making discipline of all varieties into a power-struggle. She doesn't do veggies right now, doesn't listen super well if she's distracted or playing on her own, and gets pretty cranky if she watches too much tv (obviously more of a parent lesson here :) !) She can be bossy and is also what is sometimes called a strong-willed kid, or a strong personality in many ways - she quickly shares her opinions, feelings, wants, and needs (sometimes this is a good ting, sometimes it's a challenge.) I wonder if she'll struggle with her wide ranging emotions as she gets older, and I think about how much her emotional sensitivity to tone and discipline shape how we as parents can love and guide her. I also marvel at how in touch she is with what she is feeling, how full of excitement she is, how she can mischievously growl at and then compassionately hug her toys a second later. 

Even though I think the power-struggle days have just begun, I can't wait to see all that this next year brings with it for our little Eva Margaret. She's so full of potential and life, and I keep being amazed by her each day! Happy birthday to Eva M - aka, baby puppy, little bird - you're truly a gift.                         

Auntie "Nnea"

My college roomie and super-fab friend from CO was in town last weekend and we had a blast together! Many fun photos were taken of Linnea who is a god-momma to Eva - while they thoroughly enjoyed each other at the Children's Museum, Navy Pier and just playing around the house.

Thanks for all the fun 'Nnea - as Eva shortened her name. The whole weekend she was here, Eva would say, "Where is my friend? You know, Ney-ah?"  :) While many great photos from throughout her trip are on facebook, this one below is my favorite, taken the day Nnea went back home. Look at these cute girls!  :) Lots of love to you, god momma!    

 

Christmas 2010!

We just had the last of our houseguests for the holiday season leave today... and we are ready to rest, catch up on normal life, and jump into 2011. But - we have had such a great time seeing family and friends this season, and have a lot of fun photos and memories from it all that I want to remember to capture.

This Christmas, Eva was 2 (and 3/4) and was interested in being part of much of it with us. She loved singing (Jingle Bells, We Wish You a Merry Christmas, Frosty, Silent Night, and Feliz Navidad, were favorites), and asked me about the other songs that she didn't know yet; "Mommy, what this is about?"  She made Christmas cookies and her own mini cupcakes from a new baking set, got hand made aprons and books and Christmas decorations/ornaments all her own this year, and helped us decorate the tree - until she got bored :). She liked the movie "Small One" - about the donkey Mary rode, and "Lady and the Tramp" (the story starts with Lady being a puppy present under the tree, and ends with the whole dog family at Christmas under the tree), and sometimes liked "Frosty II" (but not the Jack Frost character). She was even interested in the Christmas story bedtime books and hearing about how Christmas is when we celebrate Jesus' birthday (and yes, she's already heard her mom tell her that Dec.25 is not really Jesus' birthday, but that we remember it then.) She also loved the various nativity sets we have around the house and that she could hold baby Jesus and arrange the animals that are part of the least fragile set.    

A few other favorite and funny Christmas-season memories:
- Eva being part of Santa Lucia at church with Leah, and stealing the show with their singing, asking for candy, and dueling candle routine.
- Eva helping light the advent candles on Christmas Eve in MI - and wanting to dance up front to the hymns and so ultimately having to leave the service :). "I Want To DANCCEEE!!!"
- Faithfully opening her advent calendar of fair trade chocolate with me every morning, and loving the sweet treat AND learning more of her numbers.
- Looking for inflated Santas and other yard decorations as we drove around our neighborhood; having her tell me which ones are fragile
- Eva rubbing  a present to her face before she opened it and cooing, "I just LOVE this," but then not really enjoying opening presents all that much.
- We made Swedish Meatballs from scratch this yr successfully, using mom's recipe, and they were fabulous!

- Playing with Bex and Lucy
- Hearing her snore while putting Josh to bed in the loft
- Eva sledding for the first time with Alicia, Dave, Josh and me
- Watching Eva ice skate with Tim, Meghan and Peter
- Decorating our new apartment for Christmas
- Building our first family snowman in the first fluffy snow of the winter, and how much she talked about it after that - even when it had melted
- Zoo Lights with Izey and Ando and the excitement of playing with their family on New Yrs Eve
- New Yrs party for the adults with the perfect mix of par-tay and chill!
- Having her look out over our dinner table when extended family were here and saying, "All my friends are here!" And how she whispered to Bo when they arrived, "I am so happy you are here!" 
- Sleepovers with Kaden and Anna on their way out and back from Seattle.
- Talking about the story of Christmas with her - I think her version is about this: "Baby Jesus used to be in Mary's tummy, and Mary rode a donkey, and wise men rode camels, but then he was born, and he didn't have any hair, but he was just a little baby, and he cried, and then he grew up to be big, and now he loves everyone."  Amen!

There is so much to be grateful for during this season, and beyond - and having a little mind and heart help us experience the joy, wonder, and story of Christmas makes it such a precious and fun time. Yeah for family and friends and holidays from work!

FYI, pictures for family in MI with VerHages and in Chicago with Mosbos are now on smugmug. And below is a little video of her preparing Christmas cards for people this year right before it all began. :)   Happy 2011!  

There is Nothing Sweeter...

...than hearing your two year daughter laugh and chatter and happily cherish playtime with her daddy. Just outside the closed office door, I hear him join her in pushing dolls in strollers and walking pretend dogs on their leashes and taking amazing and imaginative horse rides; I hear their stories, the places they're visiting, the squeals of glee.

I walk out into the hallway with a broad smile and find super daddy cradling his girl while they rest together, wrapped in warmth within our Christmas-tree-lit living room.

Insert sigh of contentment: here. 

Everyday Personality Moments

There are definite personality trends that have taken root in Eva that seem to be constant themes, even as she grows older and her personality tweaks a little through each stage. 

Eva is very tender-hearted and sweet - with her dolls, with me and Peter, and with friends. Quick to hug, cuddle, or curl up in a lap, this little girl is also usually very kindhearted and encouraging. She's been lovingly putting her baby dolls to bed , over and over again, and singing them songs, telling them she loves them, etc. as a new game. She made it up and all the details involved; sometimes it strikes me how much she is already internalizing and/or expressing care for others and an awareness of what love is. 

This photo and video are of a typical play afternoon - this day she wanted to have a picnic with her dolls, where she carefully fed and cared for each baby doll and then put baby Maya to sleep.

Another tender-hearted memory that made me smile today was when we were in the car, and before we even left the garage, Eva was telling me that she liked my hair, she liked driving with me, and she loved me SO MUCH. So I told her that she was very encouraging, and then explained what the word meant. And after she thought about it for awhile, she said that everyone is encouraging, and everyone needs encouraging, and she loved me SO MUCH. :) Well, she kind of got the meaning of the word; halvsies counts, right?

Another trait I see lately is that Eva is very strong, active and a quick learner. She masters every trick at gymnastics near the front of the class, if not first, and is willing to jump/twirl/run/skip/hop the whole class through. She waits in line for the teacher to give her a stamp (reward each kid gets), plays with other kids when they want to and then runs off and starts anther course when it gets slow. She seems to be both pretty independent and careful to listen (usually). Today in class I was noticing that out of the 15 or so kids in her gymnastics class that are of similar age, she was - by far - listening and responding the most consistently to me and to the teacher. I had a little mommy moment of pride when I realized this was really often true week after week in her class - although I think a lot of it is just her wiring, along with some of it is coming from our parenting. (She now also has her front and back rolls, hand stands, and trampolene skills well-honed from this class, btw!)

She also loves most sports or active games we do together. She played t-ball for the first time this weekend with Peter very well, hitting the ball right off the tee over and over and then running to go get it. Today she and I practiced bowling (in the kitchen), and she routinely wants to run/chase, flip and dance, and "hit the ball and run the bases" inside (throw the squishy softball in the playroom and then run from the back to the front of the house for her bases.) She's got the basics of soccer in the backyard down, and lately has been climbing up the wooden climber at the park (5 ft tall) on her own, and up the slippery side of the slide over and over with no problem.  I'm amazed at how strong she is sometimes and how quick to pick things up and respond to learning a new activity.

The third trait I keep seeing her display is her deep empathy and emotive streak. The girl knows when anyone is feeling sad, mad, happy, scared, etc. and will ask me/you/anyone about those feelings!  She started announcing that she was getting sad at around age 1, which I later learned not all kids do. She still tells us and expresses just about every feeling she goes through, having a wide range of looks go across her face and also a fairly wide range of vocab to describe it all (common looks include her frustrated glower with chin down, her frantic flapping arms full of excitement, her wide open eyes and mouth in surprise or surprise, her deep chortle and giggles at all kinds of provocations, her impish nose wrinkle and grin when she's being mischevious, her hand up and waving with wide eyes rationalizing to us what she wants and how it is a good deal, and her all out full body frustration tantrum!)

She also asks us how we are feeling, or if we are having a "discussion" says "What's wrong?" right away as soon as there is any tone shift in the room. If a friend of hers is sad, she will hold his/her hand and say, "It's ok." If we walk by total strangers she can tell are sad or angry or excited, she will ask me what's wrong until I explain what their feeling may be or what caused them. I realized the other day that I was explaining life and meaning to her at a very basic level when we do this exercise. Why is that lady mad mommy? Well, she might be tired because she is working so hard. Why is that man scared mommy? Well, maybe he is worried about that old lady he is with and if she is feeling ok. Why is that little girl crying? Well, she misses her mommy and wants her attention. Why are you sad mommy? Well, it was a hard day and I am just tired honey. You okay mommy - you want a hug? Yeah honey, I am great, give me that hug. How to let her have her feelings but still express them and understand them appropriately, I often wonder? How do we model expressing our emotions and letting others in to help, but also not spilling stuff all the time and and still dealing with what is ours as adults to just deal with? Sometimes we pray together over sad or mad feelings, but its not as often as it should be; I don't think I would notice that unless I was explaining life to another little human being. But now I do notice that.                    
   
When she is excited or happy, she also positively vibrates!  As empathetic as she is to so many negative feelings around her, she is also very developed on the happy side of the spectrum, much to my relief! She jumps up and down over many simple pleasures, like 'new' boots from the thrift store or getting two star barrettes in her hair today instead of just one. When we suggest a fun destination, or tell her great job for cleaning up, or tease her in the middle of a game - her whole face lights up, you can see the wheels turning inside her head, and she jumps full force into whatever the next thing is.   

I am very aware lately of all that I love about this little person and how she shines through these everyday personality moments. She's also still very creative, smart, loves music and movement, people and art projects, has a wild imagination and tries to convince us of things all the time! Taken together, these qualities are forming our little 2.5 year old into a delightful girl who teaches me something every day and challenges me in ways I never knew possible - and that is a beautiful thing to witness. 

Being Born and Growing Up

While in the car on our drive to MI this past weekend (more photos and stories from that adventure coming soon), Eva told us quite a long story about being born and growing up. It was fairly random - she started the story while we were on 90/94 downtown and she was looking at the skyscrapers, and it was fairly long - what follows is the general recap of what I remember, wit direct quotes where I remember them. It was a very sweet little story that had Peter and I both grinning though, and I wanted to remember it. Snippets of her story relate to us having a friend over last week that was 9 months pregnant and talking about that, and she and I visiting the pharmacy together in the hospital where she was born and me pointing out the floor where my doctor was. Eva's little story went something like this:

"Momma, did you know I was born? And I was just a little baby, a teeny tiny baby, but not right now. Long time ago, I was born. And I was born at the hospital, and I was in Mommy's tummy, and I was sleeping. And then, I WAS BORN! Now I am not baby. Now I older, I am big girl. I am getting bigger and bigger!"

(me) "That's right babe, you were born just a tiny little baby. And how old are you right now?"

"I am two and half, I am big, not like when I was born. But then I keep getting older and older, and older and older, and then I can go to school and play outside and see my friends! When I get older though, I not older now."

(me) "That's right hon; did you know that everyone starts as a tiny baby and then gets older? Daddy was a baby - and then he got older - and now he's grown up. Mommy was a baby - and then I got older - and -"

(Eva cutting me off) "..And now you're MOMMY! Awww, mommy is all grown up. Are you two and half?"

"No, I am older then that. I am thirty-three!  Really old!"

"Wow, thirty-three?? That is WONDERFUL!" (said emphatically!) 

I love that...

... every night at bedtime, after Eva and I read two stories together, she wants me to sing her a specific sequence of songs. First, it's (a short version of), "Chim - Chiminey;" second, it's "Feed the Birds;" and then the grand finale is her favorite, staple, always and seems ever will be the last song she wants - "Baby Mine." She visibly relaxes when we get to the last song, closes her eyes, sighs out loud dramatically, clutches her lambie and looks up at me so gratefully from her little bed. Then she gives me a big sloppy kiss, then a cute little nose kiss, and then she turns over under her covers and says, "Good night Mommy, I play with you in the morning."

I love this little girl. I love that she knows the words to each of these songs. I love that she sings "Baby Mine" to her babies when she's playing. I love how tender and sweet and creative she is, and how all those things flavor our bedtime rituals. I love how she scrunches up her nose for a nose kiss and then giggles. And I just love that I get to be her mom. :)

    

Once upon a time...

Eva loves to tell stories and make up silly plot lines lately. She usually talks about something that we've done lately, or that she's seen Dora do lately, and mixes it up with new characters and some crazy connections. Her stories crack me up and are also very good diversions when she's crabby or doesn't want to do ________ activity. She also starts her stories with the prerequisite, "Once upon a time," although sometimes it doesn't come at the beginning. Here is just one example of the "power of story":

This past week we were packing a lot and she got a little frustrated one afternoon since we weren't playing together very much. It had been raining the day before and so we had been cooped up a lot - and she decided that she wanted to tell me a story. So, using her cherished angel mouse that she only gets to hold once in awhile (it's Peter's breakable childhood toy), here is a story about an angel, being in the rain, flying, and going to sleep (sort of). I give you, Miss Eva M, storyteller!  

Eva Quotes

Peter: "Eva, what does a frog say?"
Eva: "Ffrrrooooooogggg," said in a high, sing-song voice

- - - - -

Liz: "I love you Eva, goodnight."
Eva: "I yuv oo, momma," in a high, sing-song voice (she just started saying this phrase, and I love it)!

- - - - -

Liz: "Eva, what shape are the bubbles? How about this grapefruit - what is this shape?"
Eva: in a very serious tone, "Blue."

(Nope, she doesn't get colors yet. :) )

Monkey and 'Baby Mine' Videos

Videos are back! Yeah! We (aka, Peter), figured out why the video posting option has been absent in the blog posting page for awhile... so now I can post videos once again. Below are few recent favorite vids. There are also a couple older clips from this winter that I need to share as well at some point, but, I will save those for later... This first clip shows Eva wth her new favorite playmate, Mr Monkey. While lambie still remains her *favorite* toy for naps/sleeping/cuddling at night, Mr Monkey is the new daytime toy of choice. Monkey can be seen RIGHT next to Eva at meals, while coloring or playing a game, throwing balls back and forth with us, and being propped up next to any other toy/activity we do. This is a fairly typical interaction between Eva and Monkey... and it cracks me up.



(insert: video interruption due to fallen milk; 'meal with monkey' continues in this next clip...)



This last video is of Eva coloring with me (Liz), and asking me to help rock Monkey to sleep (another favorte pastime - putting all her animals and dolls to sleep). So I started singing the bedtime song that I often sing to Eva at bedtime to Monkey, and Eva - to my amazement - jumped right in with singing the song! I had never 'taught' her the lyrics and didn't know she knew it enough to sing it, so I grabbed the camera to catch her second round of 'Baby Mine.' It is very sweet for me to hear her sing along to this tune for some reason, probably because I associate it with rocking my little one as she cuddles up in my arms and drifts off to sleep. Since singing Baby Mine she has also started singing along with other household music - what a fun stage!